The first would have to be the day I arrived in Washington state after having lived in Oklahoma. The weather was thick, damp and brewing when we arrived. Dark clouds and persistent rain were a perfect reflection of the way I felt about moving. It was beautifully green, but in an odd depressing sort of way. My father being in the Air Force and all, I came from a line of people who tended to be good with transition. It was only in my later years that each of my family members separately told me how much they hated that particular move. It is also a difficult topic to write about simply because there is much I do not remember about it. Its all very hazy to me, almost like a dream or something, it has so little familiarity with what my life has been since and what it was before.
I am writing these topics in no particular order, for if I were this would most certainly come first. Of all my grandparents Baba was the closest to me and had the largest impact on my life. My grandfather (who we called Baba) had Alzheimer's disease. This is a wretched illness that seems to take away the person you love long before their body wears out. I was actually there when he passed away. I saw how his appearance changed from one second of life to the next of death. In one of my journals I wrote a more detailed description of the event, but this forum does not necessarily call for that. Needless to say, it was one of the most spiritual experiences of my life so far. I believe I will see him again.
A third and final difficult topic for me to write about is when I had a very serious decision to make. I was confronted with it right after I began my first semester here at ASU. I had two options that had very real consequences and I was sick over which one to choose. This was not a choice between doing something morally right or wrong. It was more between two suitable decisions. That was part of the difficulty. This particular dilemma would be a hard subject to adequately explain in writing, which is why it made it on this list.
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ReplyDeleteI can relate to the story you wrote about your grandfather. I remember when my grandma was dying I had the misfortune to watch as her body morphed from being about 130 pounds to a frightening 70 pounds. She resembled nothing of the woman I once knew; and worst of all, didn't recognize me or any of my family members. So I can understand what you might have gone through. As far as the last portion of your blog goes, I'm curious to know what it's about. I feel as though it would have made more sense to the reader if you revealed your dilemma. This type of atmosphere is a safe space and it seems as though people are anything but judgmental, so if you were afraid of what others might have thought, there's really no need. It's amazing how honest and sensitive people are on here, especially concerning this post. Anyway, good job!
ReplyDeleteLoved reading your blog. It is very touching, but girl you're killing me... I want to know what your third difficult event is lol.
ReplyDeleteI am really sorry about your grandfather. It must have been hard witnessing your grandfather with that wretched illness. I knew someone with Alzheimer's disease, and it is just so hard to grasp after you knew that person really well before it happened to him. That person gets stripped away from his life before his "body wears out" (like you said).
I had to add more to this comment...
I appreciate the way your writing flows together and allows readers to get a better understanding of the events in your life. I like the positive note you started your blog with (I have had a very good life), but you still managed to tell us the difficult things in a very subtle way. Great job!
I enjoyed reading your blog it was very smooth and you had good transitions. The mystery in your last story is a killer, leaving the reader to decide what might have been the dilemma is tough, LOL! Hopefully, we can learn more about this “mystery” dilemma in future blogs. I’m sorry to hear about your grandpa, I know how difficult it can be to see someone slip away and to know that there is absolutely nothing you can do. I appreciate your efforts in taking time to share these “personal” stories with us. Looking forward to your next blog!
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